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  • Writer's pictureEvan Swanson

What we do in our relationship with food, we do in our relationship with life - Part 1

Updated: Mar 30, 2023

Our relationship with food is a microcosm of how we approach our lives. In my years of practice I've noticed some strong trends that support the idea of how we engage with food is a parallel for other areas of our lives. Let me explain further.

In working with people who struggle with overeating or binging they may set rules for themselves which are often unattainable. Examples are "I'm not going to eat any sugar", "I'm going to have a salad everyday for lunch", "I'm going to exercise for at least an hour, three times a week". If these goals are not in alignment with the emotional/behavioral space where you're currently residing , it's a set up for failure. We need to begin by investigating why we crave such rules. Often times we're feeling out of control with food and we want concrete solutions. Creating these without the support of others often makes them unattainable. Trying to live by a set or rules rather than living in loving awareness is a recipe for failure. We need to practice interdependence, (we support people, people support us). It's a relationship of giving and receiving and it has a flow to it.

It's also crucial to look at where else in our lives we set hard fast rules. Often if we struggle with overeating food to the point of physical pain repeatedly we also struggle with overconsumption in there facets of our lives such as shopping, social media, drinking beverages, chewing gum, even talking at times. I've noticed that my clients who struggle with overconsumption often report an emptiness inside, a lack of connection with self. They report that they are desperately trying to be able to get a sense of themselves. We need to find a way to work together to turn that emptiness into spaciousness. There may have been some form of neglect in childhood and the person is seeking connection or fulfillment. Ultimately each person is the captain of their own journey, but it's always good to have an extra set or two of eyes to help us stay on our path. We often don't know why we're doing what we doing, we just do it! Awareness is the birthplace of willingness.

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